Sunday, June 12, 2011

IVF it is....

I had my routine Day #3 appointment for blood work and an ultrasound...luckily Dr. Katz (my doc) was the one on duty today (they rotate on the weekends, so a lot of time you don't get to see "your" doc), so I actually got to chat with him for a bit. Although he had originally told us 4 IUIs is what he recommended he said that after this last one, he really doesn't feel like it will be productive. There's basically a 10-15% success rate for each IUI procedure, however MOST people see success within 3 attempts. The timing and preparations leading up to all 3 IUIs have been perfect and unfortunately there's no way to know what is going wrong after that. We've been spending between $700-$800 per month on the IUIs (with monitoring, drugs, the procedure, sperm wash, etc.), so it's not breaking the bank, but it's not chump change by any means either! I know people who have done 4, 5 and up to 9 IUIs with no success which is scary!

So he said that the decision is ours....we can go for IUI #4 or go ahead and start preparing for IVF (success rates closer to 60-65%). When I asked him what he would do if he were us, he said IVF with absolutely no hesitation.

We had to make a decision about the IUI TODAY, because if we did want to proceed with the IUI I'd have to start meds tonight. So it was all a little overwhelming. I was fine in the office and on the way home. But once I got home and Dave asked me about it, I had yet another break down. This is not normal for me. I'm weird - in my previous life I cried A LOT, but not about important things...I cry at Hallmark commercials, The Biggest Loser, Extreme Home Makeover and anytime I hear the song "Carolina in my Mind" by James Taylor (reminds me of my cheering days), but when it comes to real life stuff I'm really good at putting up walls like Fort Knox and holding it all together like a champ. Well now for some reason my walls are broken, no matter how hard I try, I can't put them UP. Poor Dave, he's not used to seeing this side of me. He just laid in the bed and rubbed my back and kept telling me that it will be ok.

I honestly never thought that we would get to this point...nothing against IVF it is AMAZING technology and I have learned that SO many of my friends have and are going through IVF now. I just never thought that it would be ME in those shoes. The preparations and drugs are just so hard on your body and spirit and of course, the cost is insane! Now I know that you can't put a price on the happiness a child brings but still...it's so frustrating to live in a state that does not require that insurance companies assist with infertility treatments. This is not a "choice" that I've made, this is a "choice" that was never given to me. I'm not an unemployed person choosing to have additional children so that I can accept more welfare from the government, I'm a hard working, tax paying citizen who just wants to have a family that we plan to support ourselves, not rely on the government to do so. (ok I'm off my political soapbox now).

We have a meeting with Dr. K, his nurses and the financial counselor on June 24th but basically it comes down to 3 options:

1. $12,500 = one try, includes the procedure, monitoring and injectables (4-5 shots per day on many days - YOWZA)

2. $16,000-ish = 2 tries

3. $20,000-ish = 3 tries (or more, not clear on this) and money back if it doesn't work

Those are rough guidelines - we'll learn more next week. Right away Dave said #3 sounds like what we should do. If we're gonna go for it, let's go all out - again, we'll decide for sure after our meeting on the 24th.

On the upside, what that means for this month is that I get to do NOTHING - no drugs, no shots, nothing...I just get to let my little body rest and re-set itself. I'm definitely looking forward to that!

If anyone has advice on how to prepare for IVF, I'd love to hear from you! I'm super nervous and of course, already trying to get my game plan together.

Much love to the hundreds of people I've heard from over the past month...I can't tell you how much I appreciate the love, support, prayers and most of all your stories too. My prayers are there with my fellow infertile myrtles. God has a plan!

4 comments:

  1. Just want to tell you AGAIN that we love you both SOOO much and are praying for you. You know that b ut I feel I need to keep saying it. We are also so very proud of you...............you are writing about this experience so beautifully and are doublessly helping and comforting many others going through the saame experience! Stay strong in your faith...............I just KNOW it will happen!! Love, Mom and Dad

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  2. I wink be praying for you in the coming days and weeks! I cannot imagine what you are going through, but I can tell you that we serve an amazing God and through Him all things are possible! Love, Heather

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  3. Hi there! January gave me the link to your blog in the hopes that I could offer some support and advice since I had to do IVF to get pregnant too. Sending you lots of sticky thoughts for next month!

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  4. Hi! I am sorry that you had to come to this point-it was very daunting to me as well but I guess all happens for a reason.

    I'd be happy to share my experience with you if you'd like to email me. Have you tried acupuncture yet? I see an acupuncturist in Dilworth that is wonderful and I do think even though we weren't completely successful with our first IVF I think it definitely helped and am doing it again.

    My husband and I recently decided to proceed with IVF #2 which was very hard for us to decide but trying to prepare now as well.

    Wishing you lots of good news in your future!

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